So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
The feeling are messing with the penis
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
