Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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