Do you still have your period?
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
