He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
All the doctor said was why
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
