I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
