I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize