just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I love having hate sex.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Randomize
