Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I would ride that face into the sunset
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
