No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
