last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
