when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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