tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
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