So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Sober January is a disaster.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
