I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
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