So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
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