Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
