I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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