Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
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