sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Randomize
