Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Randomize
