I look better un-naked...
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
