The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
