She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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