im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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