im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
