Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I lost the right to judge tonight
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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