um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Randomize
