Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
