I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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