I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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