how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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