Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
