At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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