I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Randomize
