one word: firstdatebathroomanal
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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