Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize
