I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Terrible idea I love it
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
