I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Randomize