you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
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