I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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