this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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