I would go down on you faster than GM stock
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Randomize
