she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize