no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Life is so much better after having sex.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize