I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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