Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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