sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
