Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
