awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Randomize
