i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Randomize
