I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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